I once got zapped by lightning at the computer

while playing Call of Duty. I felt it thru the

mouse, a small jolt. The computer restarted

and we were both fine, but ever since then…

***I’ve got super powers.***


Technology sales by day, crime fighting by night…

my signal on the night sky: a green,

fully charged battery. It brings hope to the hopeless

and is the scourge of technophobes everywhere.


They call me, “Direct Current.”


What’s that?  A cry for help?

A laser is shooting down all our satellites?


It’s obviously the dastardly devious deeds of

Doctor Disconnect, my arch nemesis!

I swoop in and overload his circuits.


Did someone say the Chinese are plotting to

sabotage American infrastructure?


Soon, I’m fighting ninja hackers in the reactor

of a nuclear power plant.  Armed with

nunchucks and malware, they throw

high kicks, and I throw EMPs—from my mind!


No trouble is too small.  Where there’s

techno woes there’s Direct Current!


I see an overwhelmed mother of three stepping

from her minivan while juggling groceries.

She’s about to drop her new phone on the driveway!

Swoosh—caught an inch before the ground!


I could do without the spandex

but grateful citizens and a key to the city—

these make my brushes with death, my sleep

deprivation, and the occasional static shock

totally worth it.



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